Be Seventeen � 2001-12-10
I Feel

Today I fought off feelings of depression while I was at work. It was fun, really it was. I haven't been able to get a hold of Becca but that is okay. Holly and I are going out guy hunting on Friday night and we might do something Saturday night as well. My friends are trying to keep me busy and I love them for that. Holly keeps trying to hook me and Thayne up and well, I am kind of indifferent to the subject. I really don't want to mess up our friendship because I have seen it done in my life time and time again. I just can't date people that I am really good friends with. Besides the fact that he is six years older than me. I considered calling Ryan tonight. I don't know if it would be a wise idea. But then again, you never know. Hmm.. maybe I should call him. That would be interesting.

Well, I just called him and he was on the other line. I am going to call him tomorrow. He sounds exactly the same. I wonder if he looks like he used to... hmm... *thinks for a bit and smiles* That would be awesome if he does.. I should ask him if he wants to do something on Saturday night. We could have fun. I always did have fun with him. It never really bothered me that all we ever did was mess around because I had fun. I know I know. You are probably going to tell me that this is a bad idea but I don't care. I am single, and I am going to have fun with it. Even if it means revisiting exes houses with them. . . *grins mischeviously* Can you tell that I am trying desperately to get over Chris? These fake smiles and "I am wonderful, thank you"'s aren't really getting me anywhere so I have to take some action! I got the advice to "Be 17. Go out and flirt like crazy" last night. I am going to take that advice. I am going to be 17 and I am going to have fun. I am going to flirt, and I am going to enjoy my life. With that said, I emailed Chris today and told him that I wanted to still be friends. I also told him that someday I might even give him this address. I still have intentions on delivering a box of his crap to his doorstep with instructions to give me back my crap, but I am going to wait until I am finished with his necklace that he wanted, that I started about a month ago and I am not about to waste all of that work, and until his pot that I was making him in Ceramics comes out of the kilne. (I know that that isn't spelled right but I don't really care.) I am not going to waste all of that work just because he broke up with me. I bet he forgot that he asked for the necklace and he doesn't even know about the pot. That was part of his Christmas present. Oh well, now I will just give it to him. *shrugs* I should wrap them up. That would be amusing. I think I am going to fire the pot at my house because I will get it back quicker so I can paint it. So, this flu thing really really sucks. I hate being sick and I always am sick. I am not going to miss another day of school until February though. I promised myself that. Don't let me miss another day of school!!! I am still working on my mental to-do list. It's not getting very far. I completed four things on my diary to-do list though so at least I have some progress. Well, Kyla just called me and told me that she was coming up so I am going to go.