Figure It Out � 05.30.03
I Feel

Fly Me To Texas says:
I need to rip my uterus out

home, but i guess i should leave says:
dont we want kids?

Fly Me To Texas says:
yes we do

home, but i guess i should leave says:
i'd suggest keeping the uterus then

Fly Me To Texas says:
I'll put it in a formaldahyde jar... and that is so spelled wrong

Fly Me To Texas says:
then I'll have it put back in when I want kids

home, but i guess i should leave says:
how about if we dont like what our kids look like, we send them back

Fly Me To Texas says:
um no.

Fly Me To Texas says:
Baby we can't do that

home, but i guess i should leave says:
oh yes we can, it's quite simple

home, but i guess i should leave says:
just send them back

Fly Me To Texas says:
Alex, we cannot send our children back if we don't like what they look like. That is just wrong!

home, but i guess i should leave says:
you know they say the cutest kids have the ugliest parents, our kids are fucked then

Fly Me To Texas says:
no they aren't cause you're the only cute one

home, but i guess i should leave says:
no you're beautiful

This is the type of conversation you have when your boyfriend is on 1500mg of morphine and you drugged yourself up because your cramps are so bad that you are willing to rip your own uterus out. How am I talking to my boyfriend? Simple. He came home once again. This is getting to be a bit insane. He told me he came home because he wanted to talk to me. I swear his family has to hate me by now. He keeps coming home from the hospital when he's supposed to be there because he wants to talk to me. He's going back tomorrow to have some sort of pump put into his leg so it will cut down on his nausea and he will be able to eat again, which is a good thing. He doesn't know if he's coming home or not. I think he wants to come home, which is fine by me, as long as he stays in one place. He just needs to stop going back and forth because it's wearing him down, whether or not he will admit it. So, if he stays home, I'm on a plane to Texas. I really wish I knew what was going on here so my mind wouldn't be so jumbled. This whole situation has worn me down terribly. Staying up all night talking to him and then getting up very early because he's going back into the hospital (and supposed to be staying there) is really killing my body. I stayed in bed today until 4pm partly because my cramps wouldn't allow me to move, but mainly because I was exhausted. I was up for about two hours and then went back to sleep because I was exhausted. Now, I'm awake, and talking to Alex again. Needless to say I am very surprised that he is home again. I'm not really sure what's going on but sooner or later I'll figure it out. I know I will.