It Gets Better � 10.21.02
I Feel

My away message was about how angry I am. Tim sent me an IM telling me that he was sorry he lied to me and that he was a lesbian trapped in a man's body. Thank you Tim for making me smile when I find it the hardest. It's really nice to know that even friends I haven't seen in almost a year still care to make me smile. It doesn't hurt that I am extremely attracted to said friend. I think I am going to try to get together with him when I go home in two weeks. And for those who did not read the previous entry, it was not Tim who lied to me. He has never lied to me since I have known him. I thank him for that.

So, I never finished talking about my evening at Farmer Jim's. Harry stayed by my side the whole night. He held my hand, had his arm around my waist, and cuddled with me every chance we got. It was .. a nice feeling. After we got back to the Greenhouse he and I went over to the Sigma Tau Gamma house (his fraternity, as well as where he lives) and drank Jungle Juice until about 2 am and then we came back to my room. No, I did not let him sleep over. He wanted to but I told him that it wouldn't look good on either of our parts. So he went home. I am not sure why I told him to go home. Lord knows I didn't want him to, but I knew that it was the right thing to do. Besides which, I am not sure how far we are going to take whatever this is between us. Don't get me wrong, I like him a lot, but this isn't anything serious right now and I am fine with that. So I think I am just going to chill with things for a while and see where life takes me. Who knows, I might find someone I like more.. I might already know them. Just when you think your life totally sucks and that it can't possibly suck anymore... it gets better.