No Importance & Pot Leaf Christmas Lights � 2001-12-11
I Feel

Okay so rehearsal wasn't as hellish as usual. I called Ryan but I don't think that I am going to talk to him again because well he just seems kind of weird. So yeah, there's the end of that. I don't really care that much considering the fact that I was the one who stopped talking to him in the first place. I think I am still going to go out guy hunting on Friday night with Holly so it's all good. I just want to talk on the phone right now and I don't know who to call. I swear, I am a phone addict. *shrugs* It's all good though. I just have to get out my ton of energy. Too bad it's almost 10 and I have to get to sleep soon so I can wake up in the morning. . . that sucks. Too much energy and nothing to do with it. I hope that I have fun on Friday night because I need to have fun.

I guess that it doesn't really help my mood lately that I haven't eaten since Saturday. In these last few days I have lied about eating and everything else that I did have to eat, well I puked back up. You would think that my friends notice that I now go to the bathroom everytime I eat and that I have conveniently already eaten every time my mother asks me? Well, I guess the people in my world aren't either that observant or that smart. *shrugs* Oh well, I don't really care for eating that much anyway. It's not because I think I am fat, which I do, but it's because I have basically lost the will to do everything. But.. I don't think that you all really care about me not eating so I will stop talking about that.

Hmm what can I talk about to kill some time, considering that I keep having to close out the screen because my family won't leave me alone. My brother is sitting here next to me now and I am trying to ignore him because he is just rambling on about weed. Speaking of weed, my parents downloaded this little Christmas Light thing off the internet that puts little Christmas lights at the top of your screen. Yeah well, the holly leaves that are at the top of my screen now look like blinking pot leaves. Tell me that isn't horrible. They are supposed to be holly leaves and they flat out look like pot leaves. I am not joking. They seriously do. Someone please tell my brother that I do not need to hear about his sex life because he is sitting here telling me about it and it is making me sick. I think that I am going to end up smacking him if he doesn't stop reading this damn thing. It's starting to piss me off. I should probably write about something that has some importance to anyone else, including me, but oh well, the only thing I have to talk about is the pot leaf Christmas lights. My brother wants me to go and get a bag with him. I told him that I would go with him. I am probably not going to get to sleep tonight. Oh well, another day of sleep lost. *shrugs* No food and no sleep. I wonder how long I can last....