Refusal � 02.25.03
I Feel

Today was just hell. I stayed up very late last night to writing my final paper for my English assignment. I don't think I am going to get a very good grade on the paper. It really sucks for my writing. And then I had to run to the store and buy a cassette and take it back to her office because I forgot to get one and she takes off points because she responds to our papers orally. Then I had to do a professional interview for Career Exploration with my advisor which was pure utter bullshit because I am not going to be a professor. I just interviewed her because she's an awesome woman and I love her to death. She's just quirky.. I don't know. So needless to say, Christine did not get to take a nap today until after she was done with all that bullshit. And even when I did finally get to sleep for a bit, it was for about twenty minutes because I had to go to dinner and then meetings. I hate meetings now. They take up a hell of a lot of my time and I am starting to loathe the amount of activities that I am in. I am just so tired lately that it's hard to be motivated to do virtually anything. I just want to constantly lay down in my bed, curl up under my blankets, and sleep the rest of the semester away. I can't do that though. I have to go to class and I have to study and I have to do good. I have no choice in the matter. I refuse to be a failure. I don't fail at anything and I am sure as hell not going to fail out of college. That would be a complete disappointment to my family. They are the people that I strive for approval from. No.. I definitely refuse to disappoint anyone.