not another fairytale

The New & Improved List of Relationship Requirements � 04.14.03
I Feel

***Note*** This entry was written at different times throughout the day due to severe boredom during classes.

What qualities do you look for when searching for a significant other?

This question was proposed to me this afternoon. I decided to discuss my answer in my diary in a more detailed way. In my earlier years I created a list of qualities that a man must have but I realize now that I will never find someone with every single one of those requirements. Yes, they are requirements. But, I know that if I go into detail, instead of making general statements, I have a better chance of finding what I want.

First and foremost a man that I would like to be with must be attractive to my standards. If I've told you I'm attracted to you then you meet my standards. I know this sounds terribly superficial of me but I can't help it. If you repulse me physically, I won't be with you. If I can't picture myself sleeping with you, you don't stand a chance. Honestly. That's just how I am. Deal with it. The second quality that I am looking for is passion. This applies to both life in general and intimacy. Do you have goals in life? Direction? Stability? You might stand a chance. Back to the intimacy issue. I don't care how experienced you are sexually. You could be a virgin for all I care. I am willing to teach. There are some very inexperienced people who are still extremely passionate, natural lovers. All that matters to me is that you take your time in doing things. Pay attention to the little things. Notice what makes me giggle. Realize what makes me close my eyes (that's a good thing by the way) and repeat whatever that is whenever you get the opportunity. I don't like vocalizing what makes me melt all the time. Take the time to find out. Does your touch feel like fire to my skin? That's a good thing. Give me back massages, rub my feet, play with my hair. Do something! I'm a very affecionate person and that is exactly what I am looking for. Yet another thing I look for is a sense of humor. I hate immaturity but a sense of humor is absolutely necessary! I'm not saying you have to be a comedian but if I do something retarded (which I am known to do at the worse possible times, i.e. during sex. I swear I have the most sex bloopers on the planet. It's hilarious.) then laugh at it! It's okay to laugh! I'm a goofball! It's one of my many quirks. There is a time and a place to be serious and whenever that is, I am, but I also like to enjoy life and laughter makes me happy. Onward to number four! Can you carry a tune? You don't have to be the best singer in the world. I know that I'm not all that good but at least I can carry a tune. This isn't a requirement persay, but just one of my pet peeves. If you can't sing to save a donkey's life then don't sing. That drives me insane. If you can sing then by all means, sing away! But if your singing makes me want to throw myself into oncoming traffic, put a lid on it. I like to be sang to, but it's okay if you can't sing. In that case I'd much rather just not have you sing. So here's number five. It's nice and short. Do you like to buy me flowers? I like flowers. *wink* Number six is fairly easy as well. Don't lie to me and don't cheat on me. Doing so could cause you great physical pain as I am known to start throwing things when I am lied to or cheated on. If you stupidly choose to do either of those things I have one suggestion for you. Duck! So the rest of this can get a bit complicated because it all applies to my standards and beliefs of certain things. Number seven can get sticky. Are you understanding? I have a very heavy past and I need someone who is able to deal with it and understand why I am the way I am about certain things. It's pretty certain that most of the stuff won't even be mentioned until I know you for quite a while because I have trust issues but you'll have that. If you've been through what I've been through, you'd understand completely. Or at least I hope you would. Moving on. Call me before I call you and make time for me. These are big issues with me. I don't like feeling that I am doing all the work to keep the relationship going and that always seems to be the case. I understand that guys are absent-minded when it comes to things like this but that just makes girls think that they don't care about them enough to remember their phone number every once and a while or take a day away from beer drinking and watching sports to cuddle watching a movie with them. Guys, if you would only listen to your female friends, they could tell you everything that would make a girl you care about happy. And guess what, if the girl is happy, 99.9% of the time she is going to want to make you happy and will go out of her way to do so. The next thing is be supportive of me. I am a very busy person and I need someone who supports me in everything I do and respects the fact that I might not always have time to sit around and do nothing with them. I'm passionate about everything I do and I can guarentee you that I am the same way when it comes to relationships. I don't half ass anything. Everything I do gets 110% of my energy. (I have a lot of energy, tee hee.) The tenth thing that I ask is that you have some sort of intelligence. I will not dumb my vocabulary down anymore so you understand me. If I have to explain 6 words of a 7 word sentence to you then don't even bother. Seriously. I like people who are my intellectual equals, or at least close. So please, use Hooked on Phonics or something before you talk to me. The next three things don't really need much of an explanation so I will just come out and list them. Do not live with your parent. Have a driver's license (I can't get mine yet due to the fact that my body likes to have seizures and the DMV doesn't like that about me). And last but not least, make the first move. Wait, this might need explanation. If you want to kiss me and it's pretty certain that I want you to kiss me, then damnit just do it! I am not going to kiss you. I'm old fashioned in that respect. Now, how can you be certain that I want you to kiss me? Just pay attention to the next few sentences and you will know. I tend to make it clear as day. How close am I sitting to you? Can you fit a mack truck between us or can you smell the lotion on my skin? If it's the latter of the two well then yeah, kiss away. If it's the former, I'm probably not into you just yet. If it's in between then most likely I am still uncertain. When I talk to you am I playful (i.e. do I touch your shoulder, hand, leg, other miscellaneous body parts)? Are my eyes bright? That's normally an anticipation thing. Yeah so if any of these apply to how I act around you, get up the balls and kiss me. I won't slap you, I promise.